Numbers in line...

A week has flown by since my last post... a busy week here in our household! My husband returned from his business trip, so we had a re-Christmas and re-birthday celebration last weekend. More yummy foods, more presents to open, more of the general madness, merriment, and disruption from routine that is brought on by a holiday. This time Daniel's blood sugar stayed in line, however.

We seem to have difficulty keeping Daniel's blood sugar stable while traveling. Also, Daniel wasn't incredibly disciplined during this last trip... lots of food around grandma's house, lots of nibbling without really knowing a carb count. I know it is a chore on any given day to count the carbs of all the food he eats. I experience the same frustration doing Weight Watchers, trying to track my points. I greatly dislike tracking every little thing I put into my mouth, yet that's exactly what I have to do for Daniel. What he has to do for himself. Huh. I don't mind counting all *his* food, but I seriously balk at counting up my own. What's up with that?

I did gain a little weight over the holidays -- 1.4 pounds, but I'm not too upset with that. I'd rather have stayed level, but am very happy to have kept the gain under 5 pounds. I'm back on track with the program, and will *attempt* to write down all the foods I eat and get my own numbers in line. They say that people who do track their intake religiously lose more weight than people who don't. I guess I have to explore why I consider tracking to be so difficult. Honestly, half the time I just forget. I need to find a way to make this habit stick. To do for myself what I do for my son.

Season of Sweets

It started today.


I walked into my classroom, and on my desk sat a chocolate chip pound cake. Just what I need! The season of sweets has started. I have been trying so hard to lose the weight I gained after Daniel was diagnosed -- I neglected myself for a while. Plus I was sad. Eating = comfort. Sadness scares away the desire to exercise. Bad combination. So I've lost *almost* 10 of the pounds I gained, and am almost at the point where my brain says, "Hey! Just for fun, whaddaya say we exercise today!" It's a weird paradigm shift.

Then the cake appears, and I know it is only the beginning.

The kids have already started asking, "when are we going to make cookies/toffee/pizzelles?" They came home with trays of chocolates from our church's holiday craft day.

I need a strategy to get through the next few weeks. Celery, anyone?

Holidaze

I think my body is trying to tell me something. Sneezes, aches, scratchy throat -- I held them all at bay for about 3 days with echinacea and zicam and airborne. Plenty of chai and grapefruit halves, and most of all -- washing hands. Yet, the bug got to me, knocked me out, and sent me this message: REST.

Rest? This weekend had the most plans yet, with a neighborhood cookie exchange on Saturday morning, a Womens' Group luncheon, and then time to finish up toffee/cookie making. Sunday morning church (with my youngest bringing his Christmas snakes to the tree as part of the processional... that's a story for another time) followed by a party in his classroom for which I needed to make something, followed by an afternoon party given by friends and an evening party at the yoga studio.

I made it to the cookie exchange and the luncheon, after which I had to go to bed. Nyquil, Dayquil. I made it to church, camera in one hand, tissues in the other, only for Dominic's class activity & party. Note to self -- get antibacterial wipes for the camera.

Does December have to be so stressful?

When I was in high school, I hung out at my friend Jeanne's house. Jeanne's mom made the most delicious toffee at Christmas time. She had it in little bowls around the house, and filled small tins of the rich, special treat for her relatives. She was the designated toffee maker, and everyone in her family looked forward to their special package.

When I was a young adult, Jeanne's mom gave me the recipe. That's when I bought my first candy thermometer. I started giving toffee as gifts to teachers & friends. I made some for every member of the family. I experimented with the recipe, making it with macadamias & white chocolate, or cashews & dark chocolate.

One year we moved to a new house, where I had a gas stove instead of electric. Disastrous things happened with the toffee; the butter split apart into oil & solids, the toffee just didn't turn out right. I called Jeanne's mom to ask if she had any experience with cooking the toffee on a gas stove. She said, "No!" and went on to tell me that she was no longer the official toffee maker. She passed that torch to a younger family member and was glad to be rid of it, thank you very much. It's a lot of work.

Well, after much experimentation and a number of ruined batches, I figured out how to make the toffee over a flame. But I am having trouble getting into toffee making this year. Daniel's diagnosis got me thinking about how many times I might have given out toffee to people who, for whatever reason, just shouldn't have it. I'm not just talking about diabetes here, because it is possible to guestimate the amount of carbs & bolus for it. But for whatever reason, diet, allergies, pulled fillings... perhaps it is not such a wonderful gift of love.

I have only made one batch so far this year. I was too sick & tired to even contemplate toffee making in the time I had scheduled for it yesterday. Still under the weather today. So here's my decision: I will make some more toffee -- enough for the people I know will and can enjoy it, but not so much that they will say, "Ugh, what will I do with all this candy?" I'm not passing the torch, just turning down the flame a bit.

One thing that really made me feel happy yesterday when I was in such a physical funk was this wonderful sussy from Beth. Thank you Beth, for the excellent magnets that now adorn my refrigerator, and for the other thing which will be shown later, after it gets opened on the 25th!