Nora is spelunking this weekend with her youth group. The group drove out to West Virginia today, stopped for lunch, and then were scheduled to spend the afternoon wriggling through the earth. Then they go to local cabins, scrape off the mud, shower, change for dinner, and have fun group activities until bedtime. The next morning they get up, eat breakfast, and go wriggling through the earth again until it is time to come home.
Daniel took this same trip a couple of times when he was in the youth group and had a blast. I did not volunteer to be a chaperone then or on this current trip because I just can't get myself to crawl into the earth's crevices. It makes me freak out a little bit. When Daniel went (before diabetes) I wasn't worried at all for his safety because I knew he was with experienced guides, that he would follow directions and keep himself safe.
This time, I feel worried. Why? Nora is with the same guides. She is a responsible young woman. She is capable and makes good decisions. Why this anxiousness? I've had visions of hurricane Hannah roaring through the West Virginia countryside and filling the caves with water and mud. I followed the track of the storm and saw, with great relief, that Hannah stayed away from the area where they are caving. That made me feel better.
After thinking about this most of the day today, I believe that it's the stinking diabetes that is causing my fear. Yeah, I know, it seems so unrelated. Nora doesn't have diabetes. But that fact that diabetes is now in our family -- that something sad, irreversable, and life changing occurred and affected one of my children -- has changed my outlook on many things. While I don't believe I have become a negative person, I have certainly become more wary. It's not so bad to be on alert. It can save your life sometimes.
It can also make you lose a lot of sleep!